Somewhere deep in my head is a small but urgent voice warning, 'Don't do it! It's dangerous.' The voice sounds parental, and lately I've been wondering how much it rules my life. Quite a lot I think, as I have risk averse parents. Kind and loving, certainly - but pioneering? No.

It's there somewhere, even in my parents. I can feel it buried in my bones: the urge to take a leap of faith and do something different. But time and circumstances can nullify such traits and make us overcautious, setting us in stone. The risk averse are missing a trick here: it's risky to avoid taking risks.

To me, life is a miasma of paradoxes, and this is probably the daddy of them all. Sooner or later we all end up evaluating our life options. Should I date that girl? Ought I to move? Is it wise to eat that purple thing over there - possibly with custard? Are purple things good, or do they clash with my lifestyle choices?

All too often that critical voice I mentioned boomingly asserts itself. 'Don't touch. Don't talk to strangers, don't...' I know you understand what I mean.

But, the voice has missed something out. 'Do talk to that person. He, she, it, might be friendly; and if you avoid the situation you might end up alone.' Isn't that a risk too? What kind of life can you live if it's filled with prohibitions?

Or perhaps this: 'If you eat that purple thing over there, it might immunise you against some strange encroaching evil.' Or it might actually kill you, turning you into an overnight newspaper headline. What will the neighbours think?

But perhaps, just perhaps, chronic risk avoidance is a sort of death. The early death of hope and renewed possibilities. Short crimson curtains closing behind the coffin of your dreams.

Years ago I had a similar conversation with a friend. I said I'd realised how prohibitive my upbringing seemed. 'Don't swim in the river; rats pee in the water and you'll end up getting ill.' In reply my friend quoted something which I've never managed to track down: words from a short story he'd read.

The crux of the story was that a young man had been brought up to avoid 'dangerous' situations, but he'd finally rebelled. 'Don't swim in the river, said Tom's mother with a stern expression. But Tom swam in the river and was refreshed.

'Don't talk to strangers,' warned his mother. But Tom spoke to strangers and made new friends. 'Don't stray too far from home,' but Tom visited a nearby town and his curiosity was enlivened.

Those are not real quotes; they are just meant to capture the spirit of our conversation. I think it sounds like something by Mark Twain, but in reality I don't know.

To avoid taking a risk is to avoid making a decision. When I'm feeling self critical I ask myself, 'When did the wolf become a puppy, and who made it that way?' Wolves are no more dangerous than your granny - but people think they are, and that's my whole point.

- Sleepyjohn